i carry your heart

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Last night you told me you loved me. I say it to you every night as I put you down to sleep in your cot (I’ll have said it about a million times already that day, too). Our conversation goes as follows:

‘Night night Zee.’
‘Sleep well.’
‘See you in the morning.’
‘See you MORNIN’!’
‘Sweet dreams.’
‘I love you.’
You smile and continue guzzling your milk.

But last night you said ‘I love you’ and I caught my breath and closed your door and left your room and my eyes filled with hot tears. The night before, you’d said ‘Lud you’ and I didn’t know what to think, and passed it off as you just copying what I was saying.

Well, my sweet boy, I love you more than I can say. More than I can adequately express, as I’ve said on here before. Last week, via a friend’s blog, I read the following poem. I feel I must have already read this poem, it seems so familiar, yet it took me completely by surprise.


All of this, is all I want to say to you:

[i carry your heart with me(i carry it in]
By E. E. Cummings

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart) i am never without it (anywhere
i go you go,my dear;and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet) i want
no world (for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that’s keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)


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